Eye love you. Did you know that the very eyes of the partner you are staring at could hold the clue as to whether or not their feelings are mutual?  Rumor has it that dilated pupils can actually represent intrigue and attraction. Still, they can also represent a focus on something fearful (as a way of honing in on threats) so it is best to further dissect this theory and ensure you are eyeing a keeper, not a creeper! (Can you say “You” Netflix Series?)

What causes pupils to dilate?

So, first and foremost, we gotta talk about hormones.   Oxytocin and Dopamine are known as the “love” hormones. Your brain sends signals to launch both of these when lust, love or romance is on the rise. 

When this surge rise of hormones takes place, it tends to dilate the pupils. 

Want to know a study we found even more eye-catching? There is scientific suggestion that the biological need for males to “locate a mate” that would further their legacy with children of their own, is what prompts pupils to dilate largely as they canvas for who will carry their offspring. 

When he sees your pupils get enlarged as well, it lets him know you are not only picking up what he’s putting down, but also potentially intrigued at the very least. Hopefully, interested. 

How amazing is it that our eyes and brain are able to pick up on this even before the pickup lines start?!

Back to biologically speaking, if your pupils dilate more during your ovulation period, this also signifies that you are ideal for mating as you are in “season” for action with higher probability of conception. 

Do dilated pupils always signify sexual intrigue?

Well, here’s where it is important to discern the difference between interest and insight. Your pupils can dilate for many reasons. And while romance could be one reason, it shares dilation with quote a few other causes as well. They include:

Indulgence in Controlled Substances. Drugs that trigger the release of dopamine, a related neurotransmitter, cause pupils to dilate by exciting the adrenergic receptors, which in turn increases adrenaline. 

Sensitivity to Light Changes. In the dark, the brain perceives the need for more light, and dilates the pupils to let more light in- like opening the aperture of a camera shutter to get a brighter exposure in dim light.

A anxious or fearful mood.  When you get provoked, excited, nervous, or afraid, your pupils dilate for a better vision.

Possible Brain Injury. Pressure that builds inside your brain after a head injury, stroke, or tumor can damage the muscles in your iris that normally make your pupils open and close. One or both of your pupils can become fixed in the dilated position and can’t react to light. 

So how do I know if his dilated pupils are fondness and not fear?

Truth is, good ol’ fashioned talking is our best bet, but in a world of social media and emojis, we sometimes rely on other queues to inform us of someone else’s desires. Keep an eye out for these behaviors as well. 

Dilated or not, eye contact matters. Obviously, you can tell the difference between awkward glaring and genuine attention. Follow your gut on this one also. But don’t be shy and appreciate the eye gazing that you do get. Meet it back if your feelings are shared. 

Ever been taught about body language as a whole?  When someone leans closer to you to listen as you speak, they are likely interested in you.  Conversely, if they tend to take a laid back position consistently and as you’re speaking, they may not really be that into you. 

From the head to the toes…. Don’t just rely on the eyes! Transfer your glance to their feet. Studies have shown that people’s feet will generally face the direction they desire to go (or be).  If they are pointed at you, you’re likely right where they want you (and themselves). If they are outbound, you can conclude that they either have somewhere - or someone - else on their mind and in their path of pursuit. 

Remember, if someone isn’t into you, it never would have been worth it 10 years in either. Don’t settle for someone who isn’t interested in finding out who you are and appreciating what exists once they peel back the layers. Also, give others a chance and always stay safe!